Hello.

Occasionally I wonder if anyone actually reads my blog, or if I'm merely spilling my randomness to a blank stratosphere. And God of course. I don't know if you believe in God, but I do. He believes in me, there's been times where I know for a fact that he's the only one who believes in me. That no matter what happens, he'll keep watching over me and if I work hard then I'll hopefully stay on the path that he's laid out for me.  So in the meantime, I pray a lot. I talk to God multiple times a day. I don't go to church as often as I should, but I like to think that I still keep the Lord on my mind always.

It's funny, you'd think for as much as I've been involved in my community over the last ten years, I'd have found a church that really suits me. But alas, that is not the case. It's not that I don't like church, it's just that I often feel judged by those who surround me while I'm there. In my mind, church is a hospital for sinners, not a museum for saints. But still, I don't want to go and worship and worry about any hypocritical remarks. I want to worship. And I can do that just as peacefully every morning at home as I can in church.

I wonder if I'm alone in this thought, maybe I'm the only one who doesn't always enjoy church. Ah well, people are people. Now that it's half way through the weekend, happy Saturday! I'm going to spend mine at the County Fair with my hunny. Yay for demolition derbies! And seeing friends show their animals. Always brings back old 4-H memories.

May the rest of your weekend be peaceful and relaxing.  May the 1st of September be a fabulous start to a fabulous Autumn, And may you be one step closer to God than I and actually attend church this Sunday.

Love,
Alice

Small Town U.S.A.

This weekend is Labor Day. The last official barb-e-que weekend of Summer. It's funny, the older I get the less exciting Summer becomes. This summer, between work and 2nd-job hunting and hanging with my hunny and squeezing in time to see my friends, 3 months of hot weather just disappeared. I didn't even go swimming. I'm actually relieved that rain will be coming soon simply because of all the stupid fires we've been having this year. Twelve fires. Mother nature has let us down.

When I was a teenager, every new summer was an adventure. No one expected anything of me, volunteer summer jobs seemed like less work and more of a time to visit with co-workers and talk about everything that we had done the previous weekend. It was a time for flings, summer camps, short lived hobbies, weddings, road trips, local festivities and something new every weekend. When the summer ended at the County Fair on Labor Day weekend, it was like putting a dog to sleep. Everyone was devastated. And therefor September was awful being saddled with schoolwork once more and October was spent trying to figure out how to make the next summer even more epic.

That makes it sound as though my friends and I had no life. In fact, we actually did some cool stuff. Went on road trips at age 16 with my friends over Thanksgiving break (no idea what our folks were thinking, letting us take off like that.) we did some awesome photography together, played in the snow, swam in the creek in the middle of winter, we went horseback riding, we carpooled to the next County over because they had a shopping mall and we didn't. We spent our weekends singing in coffee shops and going out together. It wasn't a bad life, just a small town life. School. Work. Weekends. Repeat.

Now of course, those years are long gone. The only time I'll ever be close to those days again will probably be when my own teenage children get the summer bug and spend their days out with their friends. Then I'll feel really old. Now work is just a year long cycle, dates happen a few times a month and responsibility often gets in the way. Not bad problems to have, just adult problems. Too old to let my hair down, too young to get any respect. I'm at that funky middle age where I finally know what I want out of life -and now I need to figure out what the hell I'm supposed to do on a day to day basis to get to that "rest of my life part". No college, remember? They don't write a manual on how to live your life without a degree. I get to write it by myself!

My Fiance' is making fun of the word "Blog." and we're debating who came up with the word. I must go and win this battle now. Good day!

Love,
Alice

Who I am-

A little bit about myself...

Who are you reading about, you wonder? Lets call me Alice. That works just fine.

I love my guitar. I love my three best friends. I love coffee. I love driving fast down a dirt road. I love shooting guns. I love shopping. I love rock music. I love picking up my paycheck. I love zombie movies. I love writing. I love traveling. I love singing. I love the beach. And I love my fiance quite dearly.

But I wouldn't want you to think I'm all rainbows and stuff:

I hate distance. I hate mushrooms. I hate people who whine. I hate heights. I hate hypocrites. I hate feeling helpless. That's a big one; helplessness. That feeling where no matter how hard you work, how much you try,  nothing good comes of it. Life's a bitch. but if it were easy it'd be a slut, and no one wants that.

I live in a small town, the kind where you buy new converse and everybody knows. Even people who don't have Facebook. It's that small. I used to hate it, until I left for a while, travelling around to a few states, hopping from here to there, that's when you actually start to miss home.

I'm engaged to a United States Marine. He's a few years older than me, strong, funny, sexy as hell. Totally out of my league, in my mind. But he's my best friend, the one person I can tell anything to and know that he'll still be there even when we're at our worst. Unconditional love and all that.

I'm in my 20's, I'm the only one of my friends who's not in college, or even remotely interested in attend college. It's nothing personal, it's just the thought of sitting through class for hours at a time whilst falling deeper and deeper into debt is not an attractive proposition to me. Don't get me wrong, I am insanely proud of all of my college bound friends, it's just not for me. Not because I'm dumb, just because I like to make money more than spend it. And I love my job, and my boss. I won't tell you what it is though, because it sounds like a place where on the insanely dull and brainy go just for the excitement deprivision.

All in all, this is my life. The ups and downs of a small town girl with big plans, bigger dreams, and a Faith to match. Post 1: complete. I'll let y'all know what's up soon.

Love,
Alice